Sunday, 11 April 2010

The red tape

We've all got phobias. Some people are afraid of men with beards, some people are afraid of white sheets and some minorities fear spiders. That's right, they have got the very rare case of urban neurosis affecting most women and grown men who have dreamt about having a designer dog - arachnophobia.

Take a moment to picture yourself in your most vulnerable environment, the place where you seek peace and tranquility, for instance your communal garden or... your bedroom. You are getting ready for bed and you get that strange sensation that somebody is watching you. Being indoors you know it cannot be a CCTV surveillance officer eating a bag BBQ nuts who most likely has been following you for the past 14 years, it is definitely an 'analogue presence'. So you turn around, peeking hesitantly with one eye (the right one since you are slightly far sighted on the left). As you glance at the corner by your bed where the negative fung shway energies were leading your suspecting eyeballs, your breath halts upon the sight of the hairy multiple legged one: a spider.

You reach for the extra strong, 24h lasting hair spray or deodorant ( there is no doubt they have the same toxic metallurgical derivants) and you spray the intruder like there was no ozone layer until he has no place to escape other than that one nasty opening in the wall. This is the moment when you get out the big guns: you grab your ultra adhesive red lasso and tape the cauliflower out of the evil bastard's shelter.

P.S.: How do you check if he is still in there?

The display of the red tape in my friend's house was so artistic to me that I could not do less than to consider the image plus 'notis perscribtus' of it a record of performance art.

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